Monday, April 2, 2012

Does anyone else still watch Judging Amy?

Does anyone else out there still watch re-runs of Judging Amy?  I started watching it as a junior in college for a social work project, and was quickly hooked.  I happily found re-runs play on GMC while I was home with Lilli right after her birth, and would tape them to watch during midnight feedings....

On to the point...

Today's episode I watched (which I really think was recorded last week...but anyway) was when Maxine suffers from two heart attacks.  As the family does their drama and "whose fault it is" shpell, the wise Ignacio sits down to talk to Vincent about Maxine and states that she is ashamed of the past and fearful of the future.

Umm.....helllo!  That is so me....ashamed of what I have been in my past and fearful of what is to come in the future.

I don't know about many of you, but I have always been the Fat (insert pronoun here.)  The Fat Sister.  The Fat Friend.  The Fat Mom.  What am I going to be now?  What will my new identity look like?  What will I look like?

I have my final psych appointment tomorrow and after that I should be able to schedule my surgery...and while I am filled with anticipation and excitement, there is a little voice inside that is unsure.  Unsure of what I will look like, what I will feel like, what I will become.

Stick around.....I hope I will find some answers soon....

2 comments:

  1. Hi! I am your first follower. I am honored.

    From reading over your posts, you are TOTALLY getting that this journey of weight loss is MENTAL. A complete MENTAL game. No matter the method, WLS, etc it's all about getting your brain in the right space.

    And it looks like you're on your way.

    Keep us updated on how things are going :)

    PS: please turn off your word verification on comments. thanks

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  2. new follower :) http://insidevoutside.blogspot.com/

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