or another name for this blog.....
Why I am not telling people I am having surgery until after the fact....
So, I made my way to GNC today in search of unflavored protein powder to add to soups and liquids after surgery (3 days away now!) and made the mistake of thinking the lady behind the counter would want to help. The conversation went like this...
Skinny Bitch Behind The Counter (SBBTC) ~ Is there something I can help you find?
Me: Yes, I am looking for unflavored protein powder.
SBBTC ~ Can I ask who is going to use this?
Me: (Thinking she is going to be helpful) I am
SBBTC ~ (With a look) And what are you going to use it for.
Brief Intermission....this is EXACTLY why I have such fear of places like this....I felt I was being judged and she doesn't even know me.
Me: I am have stomach surgery on Monday and I need it for the post-op diet.
SBBTC ~ Stomach surgery? Have you tried other things first?
Me: What I wanted to say : No, biotch....I thought, oh, let me get morbidly obese and then just have my body altered to fix it.
What I did say: Yes, I have tried everything else. Do you have unflavored protein powder?
SBBTC ~ Have you ever heard of Kevin Trudeau?
Me: No.
SBBTC ~ He says that there are three types of fat and the reason that you are showing so much fat (yes, she really said that) is your hypothalamus.
Me: Nope, it's because I love cheeseburgers. (And, yes, I really said this.)
The conversation continued on until I started to walk-away and then she eventually showed my the dang powder I was looking for and I was on my way....
You know what, SBBTC......you are mean and I bet no one loves you...
In other news....I went for my pre-surgery mani-pedi today and it was GLORIOUS! Really, does it get much better than having someone rub your feet and calves with sandy scrub, cover them in warm towels, and then sooth them with delightful lotion and a foot massage....
The end
The story of learning to put down my fork after 33 years of being full...
We have a saying with my girlfriends for this type situation "I'm about ready to cut a bitch".
ReplyDeleteIt's our favorite Facebook status.
Let me know how the unflavored powder works out.... I just learned of that over the weekend.
Seriously, I HATE THIS!!!! Just keep your freaking mouth shut, and do your freaking job. Sheesh. I'm amazed you even purchased anything from them - I would have walked out on her mid sentence. Probably when she was in the middle of telling me how I'm showing so much fat. I'm with Michelle - I'ma cut a bitch. Good for you for keeping on. And I am SO with you on the mani/pedi...yay for pampering!
ReplyDeleteEveryone is a genius when it comes to other peoples issues or problems. I've had to come to terms with the fact that when people ask how i've lost "all that weight" and I answer with my standard three. 1. I watch what I eat. 2. I exercise, a lot. 3. I had the Lap-band surgery. All they hear is #3. I have to be ok with that. I'm losing weight for me, not anyone else. Never hurst to tell the skinny bitch where the bear shits in the woods though...:) Or at least think it.
ReplyDeleteShe deserves a high five in the face with a chair!!
ReplyDeleteOMG...what is wrong with people!?!? So excited for your surgery!
ReplyDelete"That's fascinating. Is it your hypothalamus that makes you a stupid bitch?"
ReplyDeleteSeriously Megan, my jaw literally dropped reading this.
I'm sorry does working at GNC make you an expert? And what medical school did you go to? Just give me the stupid protein powder. I'm constantly amazed at how stupid people can be! Good luck with the surgery and enjoy those comfy pants!
ReplyDeleteIck!! I try not to talk to the people that work there. I went in looking for Quest Protein Bars and when the guy asked me if he could help me find something I told him that I was looking for Quest Protein Bars and he proceeded to tell me that other people have been looking for them as well but he didn't understand why they were so popular and than tried to sell me on their already mixed lean protein drinks. I looked at the nutritional info on the back and told him that there were too many carbs, not enough fiber, and not enough protein per a serving and that I had one that I already liked. Plus I didn't tell him I was looking for a protein drink. They are not very helpful and overly pushy.
ReplyDeleteLove it. I bet SBBTC is really ugly. I live by this saying, “If you permit your thoughts to dwell on evil you yourself will become ugly. Look only for the good in everything so you absorb the quality of beauty.” ― Paramahansa Yogananda
ReplyDeleteThis is why internet sales are so popular. Too many people who work in stores don't know how to talk to human beings. Obviously not always the case, though.
ReplyDelete